Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
