it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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