Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
We just shotgunned beers for America
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize