I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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