Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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