After last night, I could never be a politician.
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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