so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
she just took a shower. i'll probs go down on her to encourage shower taking. it's like pavlov, you know?
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
We left the knife in your bed.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
Randomize
