Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
