it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
