its not stalking. its research.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
