he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize
