Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
