We're facebook friends in real life
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Randomize
