The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
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