I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
hell yes lets make some ravioli
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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