He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
