Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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