I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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