you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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