nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
