Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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