If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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