BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Randomize