He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
Randomize
