you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
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