My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
i think im in europe. pls send help
Randomize
