just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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