There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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