my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Randomize
