I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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