i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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