Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
