your thong is hanging out like whoa
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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