I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
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