if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
