Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
