ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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