Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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