Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Slut skills are useful in every country.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
