I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
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