Non-Jews are for practice
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
they need to just BURY HIM!
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
