I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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