Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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