I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
