at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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