We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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