You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
So vagazzling was a success
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
