Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Randomize
