We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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