maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
Randomize
