If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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